check out the toolbox for more resources

on self improvement

Over the years I have perfected the art of not giving a f***, and I do consider myself quite a master at this point. I do not see the point in using my time and energy in things that get me annoyed and don’t add in any way to my life.

I get it; you’re probably going to that after work party because you want to be well seen in the eyes of your boss, and get along with your colleagues. But if in your heart what you want is to have that bubble bath and finish reading that book that’s inspiring you, why would you disrespect so much your will and why not just say “I don’t have time tonight”?

Pinterest image with blogs title

That simple, two-letter word

Saying “no”, it’s simpler that you might think. Most of the time, we project that it will have a damaging impact on our lives and that’s the effect that we’re trying to avoid when we agree to do something we don’t truly want to. But, in reality, that projection is far from being accurate. Here’s why:

  • Pleasing others while going against your will is disrespectful toward yourself. That in itself is a strong enough reason not to do it.
  • Being disrespectful towards yourself is a gateway for low self-esteem. You see where this is going?
  • Low self-esteem is a gateway for self-destructive behaviours.
  • Self-destructive habits lead to a reduced quality of life.
  • A poor quality of life leads to depression, anxiety, more self-destructive acts, more people pleasing…

  • You see how saying “yes” to things that you don’t really give a f*** about is, in fact, more destructive than the “no” you’re afraid to say because of what others might think?

    The importance of mental decluttering

    In her brilliant life-changing TED talk, Sarah Knight suggests making a mental decluttering. This is a concept I highly believe in as much as I consider it one the most important practices in life. When you have a clearer mind, you’re more able to make the best decisions for yourself, AND not feel guilty about them.

    Sarah suggests that we write down the list of things we have to do and then choose between those that are an absolute “must-do” and those that aren’t. Then, of those that we have a choice about, we should ask ourselves: "will this make me annoyed or bring me joy?” If the answer is the first, crossing it out should be easy peasy!

    We shouldn’t forget that our time and energy are limited and that this life is the most precious thing that was given to us, but it won’t last forever. .

    Alright, for more on this, go ahead and watch this refreshing talk. I guarantee you, this one is worth your f***.

    If you'd like to give a f***, I'd love to know what things have you stopped giving a f*** as you've learned to love yourself more, or what things do you still find hard to let go of giving a f***.  

    Continue reading

    About the author

    Ana Batista is a psychologist focused on making change easy. Besides therapy, she teaches online courses and workshops on positive psychology, brain science, and self-authoring. 


    Access the free Toolbox
    with resources for peace of mind and clarity of thought